Week one

7/31
All three of my flights were pretty smooth. We experienced hardly any turbulence at all. We got delayed because of a storm for only a few minutes in Nashville. The four-hour layover in Atlanta went very quickly. The hour delay on the runway there because of yet another storm went very slowly. The eight hour flight wasn't too bad, but limbs start to go numb after a while and it was nearly impossible to sleep. When we arrived at Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris, we had to haul it as fast as we could to get through customs, security again, and get to our gate. We arrived just as they were boarding. At this point in time, I was not feeling sleepy or the effects of jet lag, but then I went to sleep on the short flight to Montpellier and when I woke up I was so dreadfully tired and ridiculously thirsty. At the airport we got our bags and had to drag them to the bus stop. Once we got off the bus, we had to drag them to the tram. Once we got off the tram we had to drag them to our residence hall, which is quite a distance. We are on the third floor and had to haul them up the stairs in a building with no air conditioner. I carried up my carry ons and plopped down on the bed to rest a moment before carrying up the big piece of luggage. Our nice guide Alexandre, who showed us the way to all of the aforementioned places, carried up the rest of our luggage up for us, for which all of us were so thankful. By this point, I was so thirsty that my lips had a white ring around them, my tongue and teeth and mouth had a disgusting film over them. But water was no where to be found. We were all hungry and thirsty so we took the tram back to Le Place de Comedie. All I wanted was a bottle of water so I got a bottle of Evian from McDonald's. I had to sit outside to drink it. I left myself a little sip for later. We tried to find a place where we could buy some drinks for our mini-fridge, but most places are closed here on Sunday. The tram usually runs every two minutes here, but on Sundays it just runs whenever it gets here. Finally, we come back to our hot rooms where despite the heat I slept like a baby for a few hours. I woke up drenched, my thirst still unquenched, and decided to take a shower while the other girls were asleep. The shower is very small. It is a block room. There is a small block partition that has a tiny little shelf on the other side. You have to put your towel, clothes and shower stuff on it to keep it from getting wet because the water covers the whole floor. To get the shower turned on you have to push in the button. It gives you 15 to 30 seconds of water and then it cuts off. You have to keep pushing the button in. Casondra and I went back to Comedie to get some supper. On the tram there we made some British friends: Anna, Matt, Abby, And Emily. We had supper together at a little place called Sacre Sale and roamed the streets. All kinds of artisan things were for sale. The evening weather was just lovely. Our new British friends thought my Sharon Osbourne impersonation was hilarious. We came back to the dorms where I called Shannon and Asia. Then, I unpacked my stuff nicely and just relaxed until now. The traffic is very loud outside my window. It is 10:17 pm here and I can still see light on the horizon. Good night.

8/1

It is currently 7:35 pm here in Montpellier, France. The hot sun should be dipping into the horizon right now, but it still shooting shards of sharp light and heavy heat into my room. The French are such conservers that I think they might have actually paid the sun to stay out longer to conserve lighting energy. They are already conserving energy by eliminating AC in all places it would be most greatly appreciated. Today consisted of classes and then walking around the historic city center of Montpellier. We walked and walked and walked and walked. And when we were done with that we walked some more. I am so tired. I woke up about 4:00 am this morning and could not go back to sleep. About 4:45, I got up and moseyed about my room, ate a nutri-grain bar, and drank my last sip of water. All the other girls were still asleep and there really was nothing for me to do, so I played games on my iPad. When Casondra and I went to the cafeteria, it was closed, so we took the tram to two stops down where there is a little patisserie called Le Maison des Pains. Of course, I was afraid to eat anything because of my stomach. After we go to the school, we went to our first class. They put me and Kelsey in a level way above what we needed to be, so after our break we went to another class.  After the first class was over, they had a table of refreshments set up with soda, water, wine, and pastries. Normally we'd have an hour and a half lunch break, but Dr. Ireson introduced us to a few English speaking administrators in case we need them. At 2:00 we reconvened for a linguistics workshop that lasted until 3:30. Then we went to see the old village of Montpellier. There are Roman aqueducts and all kinds of things including a cathedral that was too spectacular to even describe. We ended up at Comedie again, which is the hot spot in Montpellier. There, our tour ended and we went to the Mono Prix to get groceries. I bought some Coke, Nutella, Lay's potato chips, and some French stuff that I don't really know what it is, but it looked like it had chocolate in it and that was good enough for me. Climbing the stairs to the room was very hard since I was already so sore, tired, and hot. I am utterly exhausted, absolutely drained. Speaking to people is crazy. I forgot the French word for knife and while I was at Mono Prix I asked an employee, "Vous avez..." and made a cutting motion with my finger. She started laughing and I am pretty sure she was laughing AT me not WITH me. They had no knives. When I got back to my room, I ate chips and some French thing that I bought and drank a coke. That is the only thing that I have eaten since 5:00 this morning. I have met so many people here that are nice and fun, who talk to me and go to places with me even though I am fat. I am the only fat person that I have seen since I touched the ground in the Paris airport, but if we keep walking for miles and climbing steep, centuries-old cobblestone streets and I keep not eating due to lack of bathrooms, I may not be so fat by the time I leave here, especially if I don't find a knife to eat my Nutella. I haven't found one yet.

8/2

Today was a little less exhausting than yesterday, overall. Today our atelier was singing and listening to French songs. We listened to three that were totally hilarious, especially the first one. I think we might have over-laughed them. The first song had the American dirty word 'F---' in it. The instructor went right along  singing it. We thought there must be a French word that means something else but only looks like the english F--- So we asked her what it was and she said, "F---, oui? Like in America use the word f--- for..." and made a donut with one hand and a hotdog with the other and put the hotdog in and out of the donut. "F---, oui? Pardon le description." If we over laughed it before, we really killed it then. Don't call us immature, there were middle-aged people in there too who were laughing just as much. Of course, they could have been laughing AT us. Anyway, that class was only 45 minutes. Afterwards, we had to speed walk for thirty minutes to the bus stop. Then we took a forty minute bus ride to Aigues-Mortes. I am glad I finally got plop my rear down on a seat in a vehicle that air conditioning. The tram has no air conditioner and there is never a seat on it, I always have to stand. There was not enough time to walk around all of Aigues-Mortes. But we did climb the 136 stairs (something like that) to the top of the tower. In the village contained within the walls of Aigues-Mortes, there are little shops and restaurants. I went in the most beautiful candy store I have ever entered in my life. It is "fancier" than some of America's fine dining restaurants. It was also very expensive. I bought Shannon some candy that they let us try. It was divine. It also was 8,50 euros. You can compare that to about 11 or 12 dollars for a king size pack of M&Ms. They gave us a gift tin that I am sure they wanted us to fill up with candy and cookies, but I have never spent $100 on candy, and I wasn't going to start today. I went into a gift shop where I found Kendra a magnet of Aigues-Mortes to add to her collection. That same shop was selling a ginormous bottle of water for only 2 euros, which is how much a small bottle of water is in Place de la Comedie. I still cannot quite get my thirst quenched. I want water All the time. After that we went to the beach. We didn't get t stay long because we spent too much time at A-M. Honestly, it was like any other dune-y beach I've ever been to. The only difference is it was the Mediterranean for goodness sake!! The sand was cool and moist and felt good to our tired, sore  feet. The water was ice cold. I don't know how people were fully submerged in it and enjoying it. Ironically enough, the first fat people I saw in France were on the beach, and in bikinis at that. No, I was not one of them. It was not gross really. No one was laughing at them or giving them ugly looks like they would in the US. after the beach we headed back. Once we got off the bus we still had a 15 minute walk to the tram and 15 minutes on the tram and a five minute walk to our room. Jet lag hasn't been a problem after the first day. We are so exhausted by the time we get back, our bodies crave sleep like I crave water.



8/3

Today, both classes were super fun. Both of my professeurs are awesome. They are understanding that we are in the debutant class. I think I almost have my French "r" sound down. We were supposed to go to the french cinema tonight, but to be honest, I skipped it. I needed to try to clean my room. I don't have a broom. I don't have anywhere to take my garbage. I don't have anything to clean counter or desk tops with. We ran out of toilet paper yesterday and didn't know when or even if they were going to change it so after class today we ran by a little super marche and got some. Of course by the time we got back housekeeping was there and changed the toilet paper. I haven't figured out why they call it house keeping yet, because all she did was change the toilet paper. She didn't clean the toilet. She didn't clean the shower. Eight females are sharing this shower and it is getting nasty with hair and dirt already. My tiny little garbage can is full. There are fuzz balls and other random things on my floor. My sheets need to be changed. She did none of that, just the toilet paper. I wouldn't mind doing it myself, but I just don't have anything to do it with. We left for Comedie again after that. Guess what we did. If you guessed walked and walked and walked, you are correct. We discovered all kinds of neat places. I bought some postcards to mail and a pair of pretty sunglasses for only 5 euros. Then I came back to my room and just relaxed. Tomorrow night we have an Occitane dance thing to go to. We don't have to stay the whole time so I'll probably go home about 9:00. No, I won't be alone in the dark. Remember, it doesn't get dark here until after 10:00.


8/4

Today class was frustrating. I was paired up with a Spanish guy who could speak English or French. We had to each pick a person on the map and ask where the other's was on our map. We could not understand each other. Everyone here besides the Americans knows more than one language. Nearly everyone knows English. It makes it easier for us, sure, but then we are the dumb ones. Of course, I don't really think it is fair to call us dumb. It is just really hard to find foreign language teachers in the US. There are people here from China, Korea, Mexico, Spain, Germany, Holland, Italy, Norway, Lithuania, Russia, Sudan, and Israel and every single solitary one of them speak English, plus others. The tiny little Mexican girl in my class knows Spanish, English, Russian, is learning French, and then will be learning Mandarin Chinese. We Americans are the lowliest of the low here. We are the ones not laughing when our guide tells a joke in French. We exhale a dutiful and poorly-timed "haha" anyway.

After class the atelier was full, so we came back to our room. I went into town deliberately alone. I went to McDonald's to get wifi and I stayed there quite awhile. I went to the ATM and was going to go to la Poste, but I forgot my postcards. I white like being alone. I had my headphones on listening to my happy music. At least I didn't have to listen to Condescendra (that is my new nickname for her) say things like, "people with Southern accents are stupid," "people from Tennessee are stupid." "I'm from Illinois. People from Illinois aren't stupid. It's just the governors." yeah, ok. She is always snapping at me for sounding Southern when I say French words. Well, I have news for her. I AM American and beyond that, I AM Southern. I don't like wine or beer. I wouldn't force a French person to sound Southern if he cme to Tennessee. I came here for a cultural experience. I try the wine every time, and I just don't like it. I am who I am no matter where I am. I can immerse my self into another culture without becoming another person. I can appreciate other cultures WITHOUT wine and people here can understand me clearly enough when I speak to them WITH my Southern accent. She wants to room with me in Paris. I haven't told her no yet, but I will. The other three aren't even close to being annoying as she is. There was a dance at school this evening. We did old Occitan folk dances. We were bouncing all over each other. Jeromie, one of our guides, played the harmonica, accordion, and drums at the same time.  it was really fun, but after three songs and it being so hot I had sweat so much that my clothes were so drenched that I could literally wring them and water come pouring out. It was really uncomfortable so I made the trek home alone in the dark and I did not like it. I made it safely, of course. I have showered, cooled off some, and I will go to bed now.

8/5

Today was so miserably got that I could not stop sweating. I was dripping on my paper in class. They really should consider AC units for 90+ degrees. After class I was planning on going to Comedie for wifi and to find la Poste, but Condescendra wanted me to do laundry with her. I did since had to do laundry anyway and did not want to do it alone. I think she just wanted to use my soap that I got at Mono Prix. We have our good moments, we really do. It is just that her blimp of an ego overshadows them, and her big head takes over the room and leaves space for little else. I still can't believe that I paid 2 € to dry my clothes and they still were wet. I had to come home and hang stuff around my room to get them to dry. We went to a party at the school where I believe there was more wine than in Napa Valley. Nope, I still don't like it. I did drink Orangina, it is a European beverage. So there is me a cultural beverage experience. BAM! They were all going to the disco afterwards and I didn't want to go, so I left the party before it got dark and went back to my room alone. At least before I left the British people told me how they just loved to hear me talk. They said it was so fun to hear me say certain words and that they were jealous because they didn't sound that cool when they spoke. They said it to me right in front of Condescendra, but they didn't say it to her. Don't worry, she got her "southern people are stupid" spill in before I could get away.


8/6

Today we went to Carcassone. It was a 2 hour bus ride. I absolutely loved it. I love medieval things though. This village has history that dates back nearly 2500 years. It was so fascinating to see this place that inspired video games. It was said that, "No one can take Carcassone." Before we left I told Condescendra that I love it here and she said, "Really? I have seen so many castles that they all start to look the same. This place is nothing like Versailles." Really? I mean, this place is much older than Versialles. It has a different history. It was built by different people at a different time. Carcassone is a fortified village that grew stone by stone over time; Versailles is a palace built by the most extravagant people that ever lived. Of course it is nothing like Versailles. Think about what happened to Marie Antoinette, it must have been much easier to take Versailles. Any way, I ran around with the other three at Carcassone. I ate at the cutest little restaurant. I ate duck. Yes, me. it wasn't too bad either. I did not eat the shriveled up little tomato though. I bought a bunch of stuff, spent way too much money. I got myself a book and a tshirt. I got Asia a tshirt. I got grandaddy a book that I thought he would like. I got an ice-cream cone. We toured the cathedral and the castle and then called it a day. I slept most of the bus ride back home. When we got back, me and Casondra had a good long talk. Not about any of the other stuff, just talking. She wants to room with me in Paris still. She eats and drinks my stuff, uses my spray deo, and NOW she wants me to give her a ride home from the airport. I really hope we don't have to. She's got 2 weeks to figure something out. Once I get off the plane, I want to be freeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.